I decided to take Tom LaRock’s Meme Monday challenge an extra step and write eleven posts. (I’m spending the morning in a hospital waiting room and have nothing else to do.) While his initial announcement asked for a story, today he asked for a blog post. Here’s a combination of the two:
- Keys, constraints, non-nullable fields—no one will corrupt your data.
- Review the plan, add an index, you’re the hero—for today.
- Wide, unindexed, and keyless is no way to build tables, son.
- While the others partied, you studied. Now you’re the DBA.
- It was a dark and stormy night. Luckily we have backups.
- Since September, SQL Saturday sessions started selecting superstar speakers. (Had to try alliteration once!)
- It seemed like a good idea, but this rollback isn’t ending.
- After the morning’s meetings, he was happy to be writing code.
- He thought it was funny to name servers after dead dictators.
- Then, one day, he learned what “train your replacement” really meant.
- “You really thought people would watch ‘The Real DBAs of NYC?’”
Well this was so much fun, here are a few Tom Swifties to round things out:
- “I’ll rewrite the stored procedure,” Tom said optimistically.
- “Add a filegroup to create some space,” said Tom freely.
- “I’m going to stop the SQL Server service,” Tom said haltingly.
- “You should have run it in development first,” said Tom testily.
- “All in favor of deploying the database?” Tom moved.
- “We should mirror that server?, said Tom reflectively.
- “Can you help me with this query?” Tom inquired.